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The last four years have been an on-again, off-again love affair. Of course, not with anyone in particular but rather with the whole concept of dating. There has been either darkness or light, feast or famine.

There was also a cycle. It’s common and not particularly interesting. Download dating apps…


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If there is one assumption about single life that I loathe more than anything else, it’s the idea that single women are somehow lacking. Lacking what? Name it. Companionship. Contentment. Love. Self-actualization. None of this is true.

There is this notion that there are two groups of people out there…


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I met my college boyfriend in the poetry section of Bookman’s in Flagstaff, Arizona. If that does not scream “I was an overly emotional 19-year-old English major attending a small liberal arts college,” I do not know what does. I was with my friend Winnie. No, seriously. I was also…


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My high school reunion came and went this weekend. I gave attending approximately 64 seconds of thought before landing solidly in the camp of, “Oh hell no.”

To be clear, this was the 30th. Our diplomas are old enough to drink, rent cars, and go through an existential crisis. …


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There have been a couple of things of which I am certain: 1) Social media will freak me out with their weird Jedi mind tricks and the ads they push in front of me. 2) Those ads have rarely ever made me feel happy about life.

That is, until now.


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The path to self-love and radical self-acceptance is a long one. I’ve been walking it for a long time and I can honestly say I have turned back and started over more than a few times. It’s not easy. …


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Technically speaking, it was our fifth date. Of course, there were three years between our first and second date so the timeline is a little weird, to begin with. So, maybe it was our fourth date. It really doesn’t matter.

There was a crossroads I found myself at that night…


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When the news alert came through on social media that Mollie Tibbit’s killer had been sentenced to life in prison this week, I felt both a wave of justice and an unsettling resurgence of anger.

I felt the need to remind people that Mollie Tibbits was on a run when…


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I recently wrote an article about a man who walked up to a nice-looking woman in a restaurant and got shot down like a stunt plane in Top Gun. There were comments. So. Many. Comments. …


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I had two very different conversations with two different people on the same subject: how someone’s kids become an issue for people dating over a certain age. That certain age, it seems, is about 45. There’s a reason for that number and there’s a reason for the issue.

Of course…

Vanessa Torre

Flaming pinball, nerd, music lover, wine snob, horrible violin player. No, I won’t stop taking pictures of my drinks. vanessaltorre@gmail.com IG: vanessaltorre

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