You have misunderstood. My friend and I did not speak for 20 years. We followed each other on social media. I knew she was sick. I did not know she was going to pass.
I don’t think showing up in someone’s life after 20 years of not speaking only when they are sick is an act of kindness toward the sick. In most cases, I see it as a selfish act on the part of the visitor to make themselves feel like a good person. To say the did it.
No, I did not take away form it how important I felt. What I took away from it was that knowing how important her husband made me feel made me realize how amazing he must have made HER feel. And it made me realize OUR power to make people feel important everyday through small things and how we should practice that no matter whether sickness of death is involved.