No one is calling you stupid. However, you chose to saty in that marriage. That was a clear choice you made. What I am say ing is that women are less liekly to make the same choice. When there is an unequal balance of labor, women will leave.

I am not saying its your fault. And I am not putting this on you because of yur gender. I say the same thing to women whose husband's use weaponize incompetence to avoid doing housework. If they let them get away with that, they are enabling them.

You enabled your wife. This is the root of codependency which is hard as hell to pull away from so staying the marriage is actually understandable.