All of My Weird Shortcomings in One Place

Let me make you feel better about your life.

Photo by Estée Janssens via Unsplash

I frequently have to buy new towels.

There is nothing more unholy than the realization that the towels you washed last Sunday are still in the washing machine. Not the dryer. The damn washer where mold has now grown on them. There is nothing that can fix this.

I am incapable of properly storing pots and pans.

I have killed the same plant three times.

Twice in the last month, I have gone to Home Depot and bought the same plant, put it on my patio, told myself I was going to plant it and then left it to die a slow miserable death. Twice.

Five percent of my living room isn’t painted.

I buy tropical fruits I never eat.

Flaming pinball, nerd, music lover, wine snob, horrible violin player. No, I won’t stop taking pictures of my drinks. vanessaltorre@gmail.com IG: vanessaltorre

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