Life Advice You Can Actually Use from a Middle-Aged Woman

For those of you tired of young, white, privileged men dolling out life hacks.

Yesterday, I read four different articles about how to hack my life in order to be more productive and make almost six figures in one year so I can live a happier life. All written by white dudes so young I think there is a Senate bill out there somewhere trying to protect their lives as embryos.

ICYMI, I can sum up every piece of advice I read in those articles — Be a smug douchebag.

It would be super easy to build my freelancing career up to six figures if I got rid of my mortgage and moved in with my parents for a year so I could focus solely on blog growth while eating crustless sandwiches for lunch that my mom brings me.

I can’t do that, though. Why? Because I’m a grown-ass woman.

I have t-shirts older than these “gurus.” No, for real. U2 Joshua Tree Tour, Sun Devil Stadium, 1987. And I don’t own it in a fake, ironic way like I bought it from Hot Topic.

Here’s the problem with these insipid life hack articles. They’re steeped in privilege. Go travel around for a year? Sure…