Member-only story
It’s Been a Year Since I Asked Him to Leave
I wondered what today would feel like.
We were supposed to go on vacation to Napa. Instead, he packed a suitcase with two weeks worth of clothes and freshly printed divorce papers and got in his car to drive to Iowa to spend Thanksgiving with his parents.
I packed up a duffel bag and my dog and headed to California to be with my sister.
Please understand that my ex-husband is not a bad person. I just knew he wasn’t my person. Admitting this was one thing. Saying it was another. How do you look someone in the eye and tell them you just don’t want to be with them for the rest of your life, even though you promised you would and you tried and just can’t do it anymore?
Walking away was the hardest decision I have ever made in my life. It was also the most honest. I did the best I could to own it. I did a shitty job.
I spent the first six months post-divorce an absolute mess. I’m not kidding, it was ugly. It was rage filled. Most days I didn’t even know why I was angry. Some days I had a really good reason.
