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I Faked My Way Through Therapy and It Backfired
I wanted to feel better about myself and still avoid issues.
Two years ago, my divorce burned a swath through my mental health in ways I wasn’t prepared for. I was absolutely ruined. I underestimated how something I knew in my heart I wanted and knew was right could destroy me so much.
When I asked for a divorce, I thought I would feel better. I would be on a path toward changing my life into what I wanted it to be. It required sifting through the rubble that remained to do that rebuilding. I didn’t have it in me and ended up staring at a mess instead.
Emotionally, I was totaled. I cried every day for months. Every damn day.
After what felt like a monumental breakdown, I took advantage of our employee assistance program and went to see a therapist. I realized it was no time for foolish pride. I just needed to stop crying.
At first, it was wonderful and cathartic and I felt stronger. It was an initial release of the breath I had been holding in for ages.
That feeling wore off fast. I couldn’t even figure out how to do therapy right. It didn’t seem like my thing. I wanted to be good at it, in the same way, I’d…
