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I Did a Post-Mortem Data Analysis of Four Years of Dating
Emotions and feelings are one thing. Data are another.
It’s officially been four years since my marriage ended. Four years that consisted of almost 50 first dates. Maybe a dozen of those resulted in second dates. That dozen garnered an unhealthy on-again-off-again relationship, an early pandemic boyfriend, and the relationship that broke the camel’s back.
If you had asked me three months ago to sum up the past four years of dating, I would have thrown you one word: failure. Well, maybe two: epic failure. I would also be horribly wrong. Let me explain.
I am in the midst of what will probably be a good stint in what I would have previously referred to as the clinker of singlehood.
The reality, though, is that singlehood does not equate to prison. It’s not a life sentence. It’s not solitary confinement, and relationships are not some magical warden to let us out so we can start living “normal” lives again.
I have channeled all of my mental resilience into being happily single. The saddest part of that sentence is the amount of energy it takes to get there.
Single people have a mountain to climb in this regard. It is hard self-awareness work that is wholly unrecognized and unrewarded…
