Member-only story
I Am an Accidental Foster Girlfriend
Why I do it, why they do it, what it feels like, and why I’m quitting.
I have a pattern that has emerged in my love life since I got divorced five years ago. I did not see this coming. It’s not something you do. But one day, it hits you in the cruelest way. It’s a holy shit moment. Today is my holy shit moment.
Many months ago, I tried to get real about my dating experiences, patterns of behaviors and choices, and commonalities in the men I chose. This is not something that came up in my data. There was no way it could. I lacked the necessary info.
I am a foster girlfriend. The difference between me and some foster girlfriends is that I never chose this. At least, not intentionally.
The term is still relatively young. The earliest I first see it pop up is July 17, 2020.
A foster girlfriend is a woman who dates men who do not stay with her but move on to get “rehomed” to their forever girlfriend.
What it looks like
I have dated exactly four men since I divorced. I don’t speak to the first one and can’t confirm whatever happened to him.
